LifeApps Digital Media Inc (PINK:LFAP) are Number One on the Pumper’s List

Do you remember when you were a child how there was that kid who wanted to show you that he/she was better than you and to do that, they came up with all sorts of lies like telling you that their dad drove a Rolls-Royce? Well, LifeApps Digital Media Inc (PINK:LFAP) are a bit like that.

They have been something of a pumper favorite recently and since they have started trading around October, 2012 they have been featured in dozens of newsletters. As you’d expect, the emails all sound extremely exciting and they all tell us that LFAP is on its way to making millions. The truth is, every time the emails stop, there is a drop in their price. Now they are at it again. This time, however, they have also published some news to help them keep the pennies going. And the news sound about as massive as the claims of that annoying little kid from your childhood.

According to the headlines coming out of LFAP, their online magazine called YouWorkOut has been at the number 1 position in Apple’s Newsstand, the place where iPhone and iPad owners download their online magazines from. Well, at least that’s what we thought the news was at first. It turned out that they were at the number 1 spot of a sub-category of the Newsstand in the What’s Hot section. As far as we could tell from the rather ambiguous explanations in the press-release, they are no longer holding the top spot, but that’s not the biggest problem. The biggest worry is that the fact that their app is featured in a sub-menu of the sub-menu in iTunes doesn’t necessarily translate into thousands of downloads. And if LFAP really want to do anything, they will need downloads, and lots of them.

While Apple refuse to tell us how many people have actually downloaded the app, Google have no problem with that. The magazine is also available for Android devices and it is on Google’s Play. In there you will see that YouWorkOut has been downloaded between 10 and 50 times. We haven’t forgotten the zeroes – less than fifty people from around the world with an Android devices have downloaded LFAP‘s marvelous magazine.

This hasn’t been enough to make LFAP a successful company as can be seen from the financials:

• cash: $975 thousand
• current assets: $983 thousand
• current liabilities: $13 thousand
• revenue: $440
• net loss: $21 thousand

Sure, when we first saw the assets and liabilities section of the report even we thought that they might be quite well off, but with a total of $440 in revenue for a quarter of a year, that won’t last long.

The moral of the story is that instead of trying to convince us how great a company they are, they will need to put in a real effort to promote the thing that brings them money: an online magazine with David Beckham on the cover.

There are a number of companies that rely on hype alone. They eventually crash hard and if LFAP don’t take notice they will do exactly the same. TEXAS WYOMING DRILLI (PINK:TWDL) are a prime example and 007 Stock Chat, who are part of the promotional campaign now were also quite busy when TWDL was pumped. The consequences of the touting created by the newsletters are quite obvious.